Tag Archive | memories

A Village…. And Some Reflections from the Past

Jul9

Our journey…. Well, it has differed some as he is six years and one month younger than I, and he is the only sibling that I have. Amazingly,  he always has forgiven me for being ‘me’.

Oh, and when I say ‘me’, I mean I was the one who fed that poor kid my home made mud pies at the farm, role-played bossy teacher on him, dressed him up (enough said there), painted his fingernails, and made him laugh on purpose when I knew he needed to go to the bathroom on a long car trip in Granddad’s new car. As far as labels go in family dynamics, he has always been ‘the laid back one’ – the one who takes on the burden of everyone else’s struggles yet seems to have the humor/backbone/strength to just let it roll off and keep his even-keeled disposition. My label has been ‘the sensitive one’, the one that resists asking uncomfortable questions, tears up at the drop of a hat, and freaks out in a crisis.

Even though he is half a decade younger than I, he is the one that I can say anything to and he will ignore the proper, social etiquette and ask the uncomfortable questions. Not because he is rude or insincere, but because he genuinely knows that in order to build relationships, there can be no barriers. For example,  when I was going through a divorce and I felt so ashamed about my marital failure, he was the one that I could talk to and I knew that it was all going to be okay. Somehow, he knew I had it in me to take on the challenges of single parenthood.

So, what does one do when the one who is even-keeled and laid back is suffering? We have now heard the dreaded ‘c’ word, which to me should require action and answers immediately; yet, we have to wait. We wait for more test results, more doctor visits, more scary news and we pray incessantly. The emotional toll and the lack of control is so mentally invasive as I try to go about the routines of my days.

Therapeutically, I have started sewing to keep my hands busy during any free time that I have.

And then I have sewn some more…

And I will continue to sew and pray while we wait for more news.

 

******Prayers for Jeff******

With Love,

sunflower

Moments Quickly Pass…Memories Last

May19

As human beings, it seems as if we are always in the process of planning for the next event. One milestone passes and we begin anticipating the next. Yesterday, as I was going through the motions of cleaning up the kitchen (erasing the residual from the events of the previous week)  I was mentally reflecting on the passing of those events.  What things went well? What things could I have improved on? I guess that some people might refer to this as ‘beating a dead horse’.

I love to revisit my memories of events because so many times I  succumb to the busyness of everything and I miss the opportunity to share in others’  feelings and emotions. This past weekend, my event was a bridal shower for a good friend’s daughter. Luckily, one of the hostesses (another good friend) loves to do photography and she took pictures throughout the afternoon. It was a very special day!

 

This week will be full of different challenges – new events to plan and prepare for. I guess the memory of the shower will need to be filed away in my mind for the time-being.

                                                                                                                             With Love,

sunflower